Others :: Gender Disappointment

 When my husband and I first found out I was pregnant 5 months ago we were so surprised and frankly, in disbelief. There were genuine conversations where we couldn’t believe this was real and didn’t even know how it happened. My constant nausea, projectile vomiting, and extreme fatigue proved that yes, this was in fact a real pregnancy. But nevertheless, it didn’t feel real. Even after I crossed that major milestone of getting out of the first trimester. Although we started getting questions on “what do you think you’re having?” I feel like I couldn’t even wrap my head around the gender or sex of our baby because it felt too soon and a little silly given our history with difficult pregnancies. So I was happy with not finding out and just thrilled our little baby was trucking along just fine. I did indulge in old wives tales and guesses, but I was content with being on team green or yellow. My husband however, wanted to know, and my mother-in-law, needed to know. So we went to a place that specializes in early sonograms to find out if our baby was a boy or girl. 

 

And it’s (another) boy!

For the record, I did think I was having a girl. My skin was awful, I couldn’t eat anything, and I even dreamed about having a little princess. This pregnancy felt totally different than the one with my son so of course, totally ignoring that these are two different babies, I was convinced it was the other.

I am absolutely not disappointed we are having another little boy. I was annoyed I was wrong just because … who likes being wrong? But seeing his little wiggling body and giving him a name finally makes it real to me. 

We decided not to do a dramatic gender reveal and subtly put it in our pregnancy announcement. And the comments/questions came…

“Awwww you can try for a girl next time!”

“Are you upset that it’s not a girl?”

“That’s too bad about you and Chris not having a girl, she would be gorgeous.” (not super upset about this one but you get it)

Actually, I want to celebrate that this little guy is growing and healthy! I don’t care about their little parts as long as they are you know, there and growing appropriately. I get that having two sons means I’m “outnumbered” and that chaos will ensue considering how active both of my sons already are (Should I be feeling kicks this hard at 21 weeks?!). Why should I feel disappointed? Or why should I feel like we need to “try again” for a girl?  Like with everything, let’s blame society. Having the one son and one daughter is considered the norm and if something is out of order or strays from that norm, folks tend to want to “fix” it or give their opinion. To that I say, whatever. 

I’m okay with not having to live with a daughter getting her period or doing her hair because I hate dealing with both myself. I also get to delegate so much parenting to the same sex parent (Read: less work for me). Potty training? Dad can handle that. Discipline? In our house, Dad is the enforcer.  Will we try for a baby girl? Maybe, but for right now, I’m super excited for my sweet baby boy. 

How did you react when you found out the gender of your little one? 

, , , , ,

One Response to Others :: Gender Disappointment

  1. Lindsey April 5, 2017 at 6:40 am #

    The questions about whether we will try for a girl when this little boy isn’t even born yet drive me crazy! And, no, we won’t. We decided long ago that two kids was the right number for us and we are thrilled to have two sons!

Leave a Reply