Growing Up

I know what you must be thinking: "Oh, come on! It's a parenting staple! I was told it a million times by my parents, and I'm fine. It taught me that they were in charge." And I'm right there with you. My husband and I never purposefully set out not to say it. We just never started. What we did intend, though, was to clearly explain our reasoning for what our kids must have seen as seemingly-arbitrary decisions. In doing so, I believe we won our kids' obedience, one that was built on trust and understanding, not just their place at the bottom of some pecking order in our home. And yes, it was (is) tiring. We went through the obnoxious...

 "When I'm 12 years old how old will the baby be?" I get several versions of this question on a daily basis from my six-year-old while he's staring at my tummy. He'll be a whopping seven years old when this baby is born. When I start doing the math, the age gap between my two little guys is going to be significant. It really didn't worry me until recently. A visit to my parents and a walk down memory lane in watching old childhood VHS's put things in perspective. I am the oldest of three, I have a brother three years younger than me and a sister that's ten years younger than me. To the outside world a hefty age reads two...

Dear Pre-Teen Son, You are now 12 years old – one year away from being a teenager. I was excited for you as a baby, toddler and even an elementary school kid but TEENAGER ... I am not ready. Since you recently came home to let your dad and me know that you have a girlfriend, it got me thinking and there is a lot I want to talk to you about when it comes to being a pre-teen. I am so excited for you to learn and grow more into the young man you are changing into, but there are some things that I want to make sure I tell you first. Hygiene is important. Look, I get it...

My parents are the hardest-working people I know. My mother has put in 39 years with the same company, and my father has dedicated his life to working tirelessly at work and at home to ensure we could make ends meet. The two of them scraped and scrounged enough to send all four of their kids to private schools, all while managing to go on vacations, send us to summer camp, and pay for whatever sports and extracurricular activities that interested us kids. They have more than earned this awesome season of their lives. But I gotta admit, I'm a little uncomfortable. Raising parents these days is more difficult than it used to be. Once upon a time, parents would...

More often than not, my son gets "surprises" and "special treats." These range from frequent Amazon packages from my parents who live across the country local grandma causally dropping off five brand new outfits to my own friends sending him toys and books "just because." My response is usually, "Oh my gosh, thank you so much. You are just going to spoil him rotten!" And yet even with the receiving of gifts galore for simply existing, my kind family and friends are not responsible for his spoiledness (is that a word?). I am. And it's progressively gotten worse. The first time I really noticed it is when he was little I made the first-time mother mistake. You know the one. It's when your child is...